I am Grateful

This weekend our dear friends Jayson and Nicole Scoubes welcomed their beautiful second daughter into world. As we went to the hospital to visit sweet Macie at the same hospital that Charlie was born it made me think of that day,the most wonderful day of my life. But, I also began to think of the year and an half previous and how everything that happened in that time made the day of Charlie's birth that much more meaningful to us.
My life had gone exactly the way I had always planned, I was happily married and the next step was to have a baby! After being married for a little over a year we decided to take that step and in no time at all we were pregnant! We were overjoyed, but soon that joy turned into devastation. At 10 weeks we lost our first baby and 5 months later at 12 weeks we lost our second. I can't begin to describe the pain I felt from those miscarriages. I had waited my entire life to be a mom and at that point in my life I had no idea if I'd be able to carry my own child. I was terrified to try again. I wanted so badly to have a child but I wasn't sure that I'd be able deal with another loss.
In June 2007 we became pregnant again and our sweet little boy joined us in March. I can not imagine my life without him and now realize that if either of those pregnancy had gone to term I probably wouldn't have him at least at this point in my life. I know that everything happens for a reason and I can tell you that I have appreciated EVERYTHING about having Charlie. I was grateful for the morning sickness (well as grateful as you can get) I am grateful for the sleepless nights and the fact that there doesn't seem to be enough hours in the day to get what I need to done. I feel so lucky have him in my life and I would go through it all over again if I had to because the joy that he brings to my life completely outweighs all of the pain! I love you Charlie!